An increasing number of adults are discovering a diagnosis or diagnoses that finally makes sense of their life. But with this relief comes grief. Would their childhood have been different if their neurodivergence was recognised? — “Why don’t you get it? Are you even paying attention?!” My little fingers were exhausted from the long process of tying laces, untying them, and tying them again. Everyone in my class could tie their laces except from me. I looked up at my mum, her face like thunder.

For too long periods have been a mixture of a taboo subject and a joke. But for women, this is no laughing matter. — “Ignore you’re mum. She’s on the blob.” I watched my mum rushing around the house, trying to keep on top of chores. She was muttering swear words under her breath and ranting about how nobody ever helps her. My mum’s temper was frightening and I could sense her anger was…

Why “your parents did the best they could” isn’t always comforting things to hear. — “Being a parent is really hard.” My heart sank as I read my father’s words. We had been estranged for years when I received a handwritten letter from him. Littered amongst the apologies were several justifications for his mistreatment of me. …

No, it wasn’t ‘just a mistake’ and no, they don’t deserve a second chance. — “8 out of 10 rapes are committed by someone known to the victim.” -Perpetrators of Sexual Violence: Statistics by RAINN.org It’s not uncommon for a rapist to be someone likeable, even trustworthy. In the case of child sexual abuse, 60% of abusers were people that the family knew and trusted…

Maybe perfect parenting isn’t what children need. — I was the child of unloving parents. When the time came for me to have a child of my own, I promised myself I would be the parent I never had. I was so determined to break the cycle that I didn’t realize just how high the standards were I…

I didn’t want to believe that it could be true. — “Why do you feel you need counselling?” This was the question I had been dreading. How do you put into words how much pain you are in? And how do you express it in a way that someone else can understand when you don’t even fully understand these feelings yourself? …

I’ll never be the same again. — Ever since my teens, I’ve identified as left-wing. At first, it was a rebellious act of defiance against the town I lived in. Most people were at least right-leaning, even if they insisted they “didn’t care about politics.” I felt proud to be on the left, which I had idealized…

And no, it doesn’t make them bad mothers. — “You’ll feel a rush of love.” I’ll never forgive whoever came up with this lie. Sure, some women do feel that rush of love the first time their newborn is placed in their arms. But some women don’t. In fact, difficulties with bonding affect a third of mums in the…

I’m ashamed of my internalized misogyny. — I used to hate getting cat-called. I was underage and the men whistling and shouting were just that, men. They were adults. I was a teenager. I was very clearly a child. In the warmer weather, I would be careful not to wear anything too revealing as not to provoke…